I'm really bad about asking for help. Or for anything I need. HATE IT. It's partly a pride thing, partly a fear of rejection. And while I can't really be angry when my expectations are not met if I never made them clear to the person(s) from whom I'm expecting whatever it is, I can still be disappointed. It's something I do need to work on.
What brings this up is the lack of the word "proud" out of a few very specific folks lately. Namely my parents. All of them. And it's killing me. But I feel if I ask for that, if they tell me they're proud it will just seem insincere and forced. Are they proud of what I've done? Maybe. But they're not saying it. And if you know me, you know that leads my brain in dark, sinister self defeating directions.
Either way, it's further proof that I need to do this for myself, regardless of what anybody else thinks, good or bad.