Monday, July 12, 2010

Have you lost a lot of weight?

After months of frustration, I put on my big girl panties and sought the services of an expert. A bra fitting expert. (The squeamish among you need not turn away, I'm not going to go into any great detail. And in fact, that part of it was not as bad as I expected. But I digress.)

So, one of the very first things the fitter said to me was "have you lost a lot of weight?" She said this, by the way, before ever seeing me without a shirt on.

Okay, so this is only slightly a rhetorical question. Because if you do have a pretty good idea what prompted that comment, by all means, tell me. But, why would she assume that looking at me? Cue the raging insecurities.

Seriously, I don't know what prompted that comment. I was too stunned to ask. I don't have a lot of loose skin hanging off me (yet), other than my arms, which are still quite full of fat AND skin. But they looked like that before I lost any weight. So what is it? Because I already have some major concerns about skin issues (which can be fixed, but would result in horribly scar issues).

Yeah, basically I have vanity issues. Yes, I'm losing weight for my health. But anybody who tells you they aren't at least part in doing it for their looks is probably lying. So I'm not even going to pretend I'm not completely worried about being even uglier than when I started.

Just keepin it real.

1 comment:

  1. That's weird . Maybe she just saw something special in you . I agree about the vanity issues. I want to be healthy YES but I want to feel like I look pretty good too. Skin scares me too but so far (after 130 lbs lost ) it has mostly bounced back.