If I met somebody for the first time, somebody who knew absolutely nothing about me, and they griped about weight loss/exercise/dieting I'd probably smile, nod my head and not offer up much of a response.
But when I hear this kind of thing, more than once, from people who know me, who know I've lost probably more than they weigh, what do they REALLY want from me?
Do they just want to vent about it? Because I'm not sure I'm the person to do that with. Do they really think I'm going to put my arm around them and say "yeah, it's terrible that you're unhappy with your weight right now. I'm sure all those unhealthy choices have nothing to do with it!"
Do they want me to confirm that their excuses are perfectly valid? I'm not sure I'm the person for that, either. I would like to think I'm living proof that if you WANT to do something, you can do it. Excuses, as I like to say, are just opportunities to be creative. Love to help find solutions. Not so in love with listening to the excuses and nodding my head.
Really, want do they want? Because I have a strict rule about not offering unsolicited advice. But when people bring this stuff up, to ME, what are they expecting I'm going to say?
I honestly get confused by this. I tend to believe that it's a veiled attempt to ask for help without really asking for it. I don't know what to do.
I smile and shake my head, so on the outside there is "nice, nice" but inside my head there is internal conversation going on "girl!!! so put down those damn donuts!!!"
ReplyDeletepeople just love to complain and take no responsibility for their actions, unfortunately not just with food it is also an attitude so many take with their jobs....
sigh...
I do think it's an attempt for them to ask for help. I also think that they don't directly ask because some aren't really at the point of really wanting help. I get in the same situation often and usually I spill out ideas for them to try and if I get excuse after excuse from them then I just shut up.
ReplyDelete